24 December 2011

LOVES // things do to for christmas

Traditions are great. Really, they are. Our family has the really odd one of having paella every year (not sure how that got started).

And let's not pretend that we all don't get up just a bit earlier on Christmas day. Come on, admit it, your brain hasn't recovered from being seven years old and super-pumped for Santa. (My own story of losing belief in the Tooth Fairy, Santa, the Easter Bunny, etc, is actually kind of a strange one. It's at the bottom of this post.)

So in the hour or so before normal humans awake, what do you do?
Grab your laptop, of course, because I have a couple things you absolutely MUST do.

One, read about Krampus.
If you aren't good this year, Santa's buddy Krampus will tie you up in a sack and eat you.
I was raised with books about evil fairies, and Norwegian trolls who ate children, and the original Grimm and Hans Christian Anderson stories where most of the characters end up brutally murdered, and two parents who actively encouraged me that there were several ghosts in our house. Krampus just comes naturally to me.

Two, watch A Nightmare Before Christmas.
It's like a Christmas movie AND a Halloween movie, and the main characters are all dead. It's fantastic. As a child I watched it year-round (and let's not forget about similar Tim Burton masterpiece Corpse Bride).
Seriously it's a fantastic movie. I want to live in Halloweentown and Christmastown at the same time, but mostly I'm just curious about the sketchy circle of trees.

Three, Christmas dubstep.
Do I really need to say anything else?
No I don't.
So here's some of my favorites.
Carol of the Bells — favorite song ever to begin with... and then there was BASS.
Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy — some ballet company SOMEWHERE has to dance to this.
Jingle Bells — but of course.
So now your Christmas has either been stripped of childhood joy, or made a whole lot awesomer.

Four, yes, go watch some Glee.
Go on, we all know that Glee is like Christmas crack.
It's so cute... my brain is melting. And their love triangles/squares/pentagons/hexagons/heptagons/etc are hilarious. And then there's that one Irish guy with the fantastic accent! I love Irish accents.

Oh, right, the non-believer story.
Well when I was newly seven and at the peak of my tooth-losing, I was looking for something in my parents' dresser. Instead, I found a tin of teeth. My teeth.
My seven-year-old mind immediately jumped to OH MY GOD MY MOTHER KILLED THE TOOTH FAIRY.
This is the kind of child I was.
I then proceeded to search the house — which was a former WWII army barrack, as at that time we were living with my grandmother on Great Diamond Island — for the Tooth Fairy's tiny corpse.
I didn't find it, so then I was like ooohhhhhh. no real Tooth Fairy. gottttt it.
But I still don't think my mother's forgiven me for pegging her a murder.

❦ Merry Christmas! 


  1. I never have that problem, since my little sister usually wakes me up at about 5:30 ("SANTA'S BEEN" and all that stuff)

    and your story made me lol---my mum has all my teeth too. when I found out I freaked the shit out. because... like... just WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT. WHY, MOTHER, WHY. but I was 11 or something, so it all good.

    she also told me the day as we were getting our santa photo (family tradition, y'know.....) and she tells me, that for MY WHOLE LIFE, she created fake santa letters to swap with the actual ones we put in the envelope, which she kept. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW.


    anyway, happy christmas. or christmas eve. whatever time it is where you live. have fun watching Glee. (teehee)

  2. adore this. this is the most darling post...so glad that you're loving your family traditions for this Christmas season. we're doing that right now. enjoying the family vaca in Wisconsin, preparing for Christmas Eve breakfast and seeing a movie this afternoon. we're all together this year for the first time since my sister and her Army man have been together. it's wonderful!

    happy Christmas eve to you and yours.

  3. That is a really weird way to loose faith in the Tooth fairy....

  4. merry christmas to you, olivia!
    we've just finished yunwrapping presents and i'm so looking forward to the HUGE lunch we're having this christmas day : D

  5. I used that picture on one of my winter posts, too :D

    Happy Holidays!

    Never believed in the tooth fairy. Only santa, and I didn't really care about him :3

  6. Ahahahah, your non-believer story is HILARIOUS. My papa and aunt used to tell me that there was a poltergeist that haunted our papa's house and that there was a diamond buried in the foundation of the house somewhere. And you bet my sister and I looked EVERYWHERE (for the diamond, not the ghost).

    Merry Christmas! Listening to that dubstep - thanks!


  7. You're hilarious, Olivia. :D
    I never believed in Santa Claus because my parents always told me that it was Jesus' birthday, not Santa's day. So yeah... :P

    Merry Christmas! :)

  8. Merry Christmas! Also, you may have noticed this, but I think you switched the "do" and the "to" in the title of your post. I loved your story about the Tooth Fairy and how you stopped believing.

    ~The Dandy Lioness/Sofia

  9. Merry Christmas! I hope you have a splendid one! <3

  10. Lovely post! The story of the tooth fairy is hilarious!

  11. I loved when Rory dedicated the song to 'The King' and Kurt thought he was talking about Jesus. Glee is my favorite!

  12. hahaha awww:) I love the tooth fairy story:) Wasn't it a great time, when you still believed in that stuff? I wish I could still believe!


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